#AtoZChallenge S is For Scared

dark road

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I admit it. I’m scared.

Twenty-three months alone and I still have nothing figured out.

What lies on the road up ahead? Am I even on the right road?

I’ve never been a timid or fearful person. I’ve never had a problem making decisions.

In our marriage, I came up with the plans and Den carried them out. Unless it was tech or music-related, Den was light on details. I, on the other hand, could overthink myself into another dimension, so it worked for us.

Now, decisions are hard.

It’s not that I fear making a wrong decision, I don’t want to make any decisions… because I’m now a party of one.

But that’s not how life is lived, right?

We have to move on, make decisions… and live.

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On May 30, 2019, I lost Dennis, my husband of over thirty-five years. Ten short weeks later on August 18, 2019, I lost my eighty-four-year-old mother. My grief journey has not been an easy one. While we know grief has five stages, there are many situations and feelings some bereaved never get to express, and I’m using my first AtoZ Challenge to say things I’ve never been able to give voice to. I hope you’ll follow my journey.

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atoz badge 2021

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Image by Simaah from Pixabay

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